It’s Friday and ya’ll know how antsy I get on Fridays. My ADHD kicks in and I can’t stop thinking a mile a minute and using huge, incoherent, run on sentences. Or maybe it’s the meth. šŸ˜ Either way…

How’s it going??!! šŸ˜€ I am feeling tip top again, thank you very much! I am annoyingly happy and particularly perky today! Done with work for the week and ready to tear it up! Well… as much as a 40 year old homebody who talks mostly to weirdos (yes, you.) on the internet can “tear it up”.

So I’m pretty sure my boyfriend friended his ex-girlfriend on Facebook and didn’t mention it.

How is that for killing joy? šŸ˜†

I regularly look through my friend suggestions on my Newsfeed page. I like to look through and see the gads of people who I DON’T want to be friends with… I also like to look for old friends who think they might be “hiding” from their past by not really friending anyone from their old lives so I can annoy them with MY unwanted friend request. šŸ˜†

So I am looking through the suggestions *PROVIDED TO ME* by Facebook that only have 3 or less mutual friends and this one comes up “Shonda Whatsherface” and I’m thinking to myself, “WTF?” I mean, how many people in the world are named Shonda? In all my life, the only person I have known personally named anything close to that is Shauna Bess, Damareo’s old probation officer…

I should also say that I wasn’t for sure it was his ex-girlfriend. She has the same last name as one of my best friends. This best friend has sisters that she hasn’t spoke to in forever because they are Class A Trainwrecks from hell. It could have possibly been one of her sisters and I totally am up for looking at trainwrecks! šŸ˜‰

Anyway…. So, I’m all like “WTF?” and chatting with Nate and he was like, “Go Look!” so I did. I should never listen to him. Really. All his ideas suck. He sucks. šŸ˜›

So I’m on her profile. We have 2 mutual friends. One is *MY* boyfriend. Her wall is open. It looks like she just recently friended him… or maybe him her.


What’s my issue with this? Well… nothing really… except he didn’t mention it. AT.ALL. Oh, and just this last week, he changed his wall so it all of a sudden doesn’t acknowledge that he is in a relationship with me. He hid that part. He put it back when I complained but I think he just put it back so that I can see it, not everyone else.

So that makes me, what with all my fucked up trust issues, really become suspicious. I mean, is he ashamed of me? Is he hoping she doesn’t know and wants to talk to him? Why wouldn’t he even mention it to me if it’s no big deal?

He has tried to tell me that that wasn’t a serious relationship. I’m pretty sure she put him through the wringer, though, and it was more significant than he cares to admit. But, if it wasn’t a big deal, it just seems proper to say something, doesn’t it?

I always A.L.W.A.Y.S. put myself in the other person’s shoes and say “how would I have handled that situation?” If my ex-boyfriend or my ex-husband tried to friend me on Facebook, I would immediately deny it AND I would tell Andy. I would do this because I am loyal. Really loyal. Overly loyal? Maybe. But that’s what *I* would do. Period. Don’t even have to think about it.

I’m not going to say anything about it to Andy, but it does, like I said, make me highly suspicious. I am afraid he will make it seem like it’s none of my business or some kind of control thing where I want to pick his friends or something like that. And it’s not. Totally NOT.

I am just going to keep an eye on the situation and hope he comes around at some point. I mean, how would you feel if your boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend friended him and 1. he didn’t tell you and 2. he suddenly erased your relationship with him from his profile? See how that looks?

I’m not jealous though, because I looked at her, and other than being skinny, I’m better. And prettier. And I’m genuine from the get go… šŸ˜‰

So…. the weekend is here and Andy’s working the whole time. šŸ˜¦ Nate has a Spades tournament set up for EPers on Pogo if anyone is interested. Just go to EP and sign up and then check in there at midnight on Saturday night for what room we are going to be in. And before you go getting any ideas, Nate is MY partner and we CRUSH in Spades! šŸ˜›

See you there!

  1. Nate says:

    But OF COURSE you are better!!!!! DUUUHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You already know my opinion, soooooooo………..

    Everyone go sign up for cards and margaritas Saturday night!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Sarah & Al says:

    Whoa! Not good! Sorry to say that that way but, hmmm. He really didn’t even mention it in passing? I’m at a loss as to what to tell you.

    You two are in a loving, committed relationship. He should have told you. I understand why you don’t want to say anything to him. But I think everyone would agree that this would be an issue in any committed loving relationship. At the very basic level, it’s a respect issue. Respecting the relationship.

    I hope this works out fine for you. I know once you make your mind up, you stick to it so I won’t say anything more.

  3. rick says:

    i would do exactly what you said you would do in that sitch. just letting you know. for once i agree with ya.

    • Renee says:

      That is actually really good to know, Rick, because you are a manly man and I value your opinion when it comes right down to it. I’m *not* being irrational. For once. Even in the “man” world. Thank you.

  4. Ashleigh says:


  5. Brenda says:

    Well. I’m unsure how to put this because I normally would side with Andy here. I am trying to find a good spin on this. You know how I am. šŸ™‚

    Okay. Is it possible that the profile you saw was NOT who you thought it was? Maybe you are confused? Maybe it is someone else entirely?

    Or maybe he is so disconnected from his prior relationship to her that he doesn’t realize this is somewhat inappropriate. Or maybe he just forgot to tell you.

    I’m doing a poor job. Well, hon. This time I do agree with you and I am very proud of how well you are taking it! I hope you continue to take this positively and make no assumptions. And remember who Andy is himself. You have said yourself that you trust him so try to remember that and don’t take this as a direct hit to that trust level just yet. He may and has in the past surprised you.

    One of Chad’s old girlfriends once reached out to his mother to reach him. He took the message from his mom and then immediately told me about it. He never did call her back. It’s a slippery slope, old girlfriends are.

    Hang tough!

    • Renee says:

      Oh Bren…. always trying to play the devil’s advocate… I suppose it is REMOTELY possible that I could be mistaken. Maybe it is NOT his ex-girlfriend and that’s why he hasn’t said anything… but then that would mean the hiding of his relationship status was a total freak coincidence and I do not believe in freak coincidence. Also, I have heard the story of her “going away party” several times from Andy. He was invited but didn’t go. Well, there are pictures on her wall of “Shonda’s Going Away Party”… another freak coincidence? I think not. Nice try, though! šŸ˜‰

      He “forgot” to tell me? šŸ˜† You are reaching…. šŸ˜†

      Ok.. yeah… I do trust him… but I hate that he has opened the door to put doubt in that just simply by not communicating something that shouldn’t be a big deal because she wasn’t a big deal (supposedly), you know? I hope I’m wrong and he does surprise me, Bren. Really. I am so hoping for that right now.

      And, yes, I understand the slippery slope so that’s why I am on high alert. šŸ˜€

      Thanks for telling me the truth! Love you!

  6. Thomas says:

    SEE??? This is why guys get a bad shake because some guy wasn’t 100% honest with his woman. Some of us do know right from wrong and would have told you upfront about the ex contact. Its easy when you decide to do the right thing all the time.

Say what you mean, Mean what you say...

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