I’m not a fat sloppy dumbass so don’t treat me like I am. Thanks. Alot.

Posted: July 26, 2011 in All-You-Can-Eat THIS!, Are you TRYING to kill me?, Awkward, Diabetes can fuck off, FLUFFY CHICKS ROCK!, My body hates me, WTF is WRONG with you people!

Alrighty then! I am most definitely still living! Sorry for the blog delay. It just seems like I never have enough time in a day anymore!

One reason for that is because both Nate and I have become addicted to Pinterest.com and it’s all HIS FAULT!!! I swear, that is all I do ALL DAY LONG! Pin shit. Are you a member over there? Come FOLLOW ME!!!

Follow Me on Pinterest

In other news that is equally unexciting… 🙄

I went for my doctor appointment last Wednesday. I saw the diabetes educator who wants me to eat… get this, Hil… 2200 calories and 325 grams of carbs daily!!! 😯 I know! WTF??? I have been trying to do both but I have been having this “problem” with eating and then feeling like POOP before I can even finish. This happens especially if I eat fresh veggies like lettuce salads.

Now, the REALLY screwed up thing about this is that I weighed in at the OB-GYN’s office on the cattle scale and I had gained 4 pounds. I thought this was bullshit. I know I had a blog post about gaining 6 pounds, but I think I must have had water retention because the next day I was 5 pounds lighter. Annnnywaay… MY doctor goes by the cattle scale and it said 4 pounds.

And then she starts being kind of condescending and talking to me like I’m stupid. How did I gain 4 pounds? What was my explanation? I can only gain 15 pounds total. I am still (at that time) in the first trimester. Yadda, yadda, yadda. So I stammer away that I just ate lunch and maybe I am retaining water since it’s like 150 degrees outside. Whatever. She really pissed me off to the point that I was so mad I was crying… not in sadness but in anger!

I drive home and immediately get on the scale at Andy’s. It says the exact same weight as the cattle scale. i get off and take off my walking sandals and my sweater. The first time I weighed in at her office, I only wore a tee shirt and skirt. I took my shoes off. All fat chicks do this… So I take those extra items off and Viola! 3 pounds gone!

So I had only really gained a pound and that very well could have been water weight! So she made me feel like a fat piece of shit for NOTHING! So unfair. And so stressful! And so opposite what the diabetic counselor was saying. 🙄

I am 41 years old. I have been fat for 20 of those years at least. I have been dieting for 20 years as well. I am very much in tune with my body and have been for at least the last 3-4 years. It’s an old age thing, I think, 😉 I, like so many obese women, am a mother fucking EXPERT at making good food choices and calorie counts and carb counts and protein counts and ALL OF THAT! I know that 20 years of dieting can seriously screw your entire system up, and if I eat 2200 calories and 325 grams of carbs a day, I will pack on the pounds super fast!

So do I please the OB doctor and try really hard not to gain weight? Or do I eat what the diabetic doc tells me, knowing I will gain a ton. I’m trying to do both but it is really hard! I never ever get to 2200 calories unless I eat out all day. The diabetic counselor and the OB both pretty much said that no matter what I will eventually end up on insulin regardless… 😦

In any case… I am giving my doctor a second chance. It’s her last chance. The fact is that I just switched doctors because I truly believe you should not have to leave a doctor’s office feeling worse than when you came in. I should not have wasted 2 days of crying and complete depression over this bullshit. I always give everyone a second chance to redeem themselves. Maybe the doctor was just in a bad mood that day…

I really do hope she redeems herself. I feel she is extremely competent and educated. I do. But if she make me feel like a piece of shit one more time, I’m switching doctors again. I don’t care. I KNOW I’M FAT! I KNOW WHAT I NEED TO GAIN AND NOT GAIN! DON’T TREAT ME LIKE I’M 8! I am a professional person who is halfway decently intelligent. I am a SUCCESSFUL weight loss person (even now). I’M NOT AN IDIOT! I probably know more than her when it comes to general nutrition, for Pete’s sake.

I’m just saying. Don’t be condescending to me. I’m a grown ass woman. I won’t take it. I’ll just move on and tell everyone I know how you treated me.

My next appointment is next week so we will see how that goes. 🙄

So I have been obsessing over food, blood sugar readings, and Pinterest. Make sure you go look at my categories on Pinterest! I have a Baby/Nursery idea board which looks insane right now! 😆 you HAVE to go see it! GO NOW!

I think Andrew and i have made peace with some of the ideas I have and they will probably be able to be implemented. We have very eclectic and weird personalities and I want to be sure the best parts of us can be merged into our baby’s room. I can’t wait to get started on it! His dad is almost done with the electrical so then we can start all the other fun stuff! 🙂

Okay, well, I know this was a quickie but I can’t keep my eyes open! I need some sleep! Good night all!

  1. ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME??????????? So she stepped all over your heart over 1# ultimately. I can’t stand high and mighty doctors. I would switch immediately. No second chances here. You are TOOOOOOOOOOOO nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I bought you new gear that I am mailing soon. I had something in mind to add to it but now I am changing it to something else! Thanks Renees Doctor! You are SOOOOOOOOOOOOO inspirational! 😛 😛 😛

    Okay, heading out to add to my PINTEREST. NOW!!!!!!!! But I don’t want anyone following me. You all CAN’T HANDLE MEEHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

    • Renee says:

      Dear Lord. What are you sending me? I’m scared now. 😯

      And you know me, Naters. I always give second chances. You should try it sometime. Everyone has a bad day every once in a while. 😉 Besides, I think you are chance number 2,317 with me right now…

  2. K'nesha says:

    Gurl dont be worryin bout that mess of a dr. U are too hot an u know whats up. she trippin ova nothin. jus be happy!

  3. Ashleigh says:

    Uhh. Der. Really? Your PREGNANT. Aren’t you supposed to gain a ton of weight? I don’t get.

    • Renee says:

      Well… 😆 … the problem is that I was already overweight to begin with… and yeah, I lost almost 70 pounds prior to this BUT… I had gained back about 10 and then my bloating has added another few pounds… they don’t like fat chicks gaining very much at all. It’s really frowned on since it can cause complications… but, eh? I see 400 pound heifers on Maury’s show every damn day that are popping out babies right and left! So I think I can handle it… 😆

  4. Brenda says:

    I understand your frustration, Renee. It does appear that they are giving you conflicting information. Did you contact the Diabetes Educator and tell her what your doctor said? Maybe she can help you find a good middle ground.

    I gained 5 stone with my daughter. I have good genes so I was able to lose that within 6 months of giving birth. I’m sure you will be able to lose whatever you gain. Look at how much you lost in the prior 2 years!

    Don’t stress out over this. That will just hamper your efforts even more. Stress can also affect your blood sugar numbers so you need to keep it under control. Eat healthy, maybe strat walking again now that you are out of your first trimester (well, once this heat back off! lol!), and have a happy pregnancy. 15 lbs. seems like way too little to gain but she is the doctor.

    I ended up losing weight with my son due to my bout with GD and I received many lectures over that so it could go the other way as well! All you can do is the best that you can do, dear.

    Thinking of you,

    • Renee says:

      Thanks Bren! I’m extremely stressed about this situation actually. I feel like I am constantly obsessing over food and calories and blood sugar readings. It’s a little overwhelming. I did talk to the DE and she said not to stress over not getting to the calorie count but to emphasize the carb count (325 g daily), which is really hard for a girl who has for the most part been limiting carbs for the last 3 years. Plus, the things I want to eat that have carbs like Pasta are either too many carbs or too many calories. I’m walking such a thin line! It sucks!

      Like you said… I can only do the best I can. I do not want to lose weight. Right now, I am just trying to maintain. When she starts bitching at me for NOT gaining weight, then I figure I’ll splurge on pasta or ice cream more… 😦 long wait…

  5. sarah & al says:

    Oh so sorry to hear your doctor appointment went badly! 😦 Cheer up! I am going to send you a book my sister in law had during her pregnancy last year. I think it will help you understand some things that your doctor is not telling you.

    You shouldn’t feel bad when you go to the doctor, Renee. You are a beautiful person inside and out. She should know better than to make you feel this way.

    We love you!

    Sarah & Al

  6. rick says:

    hey hotcakes! i know a guy who knows a guys wife that know a dude who can take care of that fer ya! 😉

Say what you mean, Mean what you say...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s