Okay… QUICKLY!!!!

I *am* still alive, despite all the conspiracy theories I see floating around on the internet… 🙄 I’ve just been Lazy BUSY!

So, Nate is back stateside and has not left me alone for 5 minutes with all his talk of Greece this and Greece that… I swear… how annoying, right? 😉 So he has been taking up blog time… blame him!

Not much going on… I am still FAT AND PREGNANT! 😯 Shocker, huh? I haven’t gotten on the scale because I have been in a slightly cantankerous “I don’t give a shit” mood lately.

I don’t remember having this many aches and pains and inability to move in prior pregnancies. 😡 WTF?

All hell broke loose at my work and one of my supervisors (the hardest working one I had!) was “let go”. It’s not really my place to say whether that was a good or bad decision on corporate’s part, but I will say that losing him was a great loss to our company. Truly. Huge loss. 😦 There is a big reorganization effort going on right now and that is extremely scary. I’m not confident that I will survive for another year and that really worries me.

Back in the day, when I needed a job, I went out and got one. Period. I have NEVER had a hard time finding a job when I needed one. Period. But I talk to unemployed people with college degrees ALL.DAY.LONG. I know that the job market is NOT like it was “back in the day” and me becoming unemployed will be tragic. What I do for a living is not a career that is readily available everywhere… it’s “specialized”.

But… I really can’t worry about that. I have absolutely no control over someone corporate big wig’s decision making process and I have found through the years that when you are dealing with big corporate giants, you may end up being dealt a hand that is completely illogical in any sense… and you just have to take it. You don’t see it coming, you don’t know why, and it never makes sense to common folk… it’s the corporate way! 😐

So I am concentrating on my personal life instead… spending more time with family and friends… spending alot of alone time with Andrew since we won’t have that for too much longer exclusively. I spend alot of time just sitting and feeling the baby since he’s a wiggle worm. Maybe I just took all that crap for granted the first time around and that’s why I don’t remember it at all… I’m definitely not taking this one for granted though…

I have started the baby room remodel and I am slowly getting the work done. I wish Andrew would at least OFFER to help out on it. He’s probably afraid to step in my way. I have been TOLD that I get a little crazy when I am in remodel mode… 😆 But still… I wish he would offer…

Plus, I don’t know when he’s going to offer and I may blow my top if he doesn’t offer, but I can’t paint this room. As a pregnant woman, I am banned from that work. That’s why Amy and I ended up painting Denise’s hot pink nursery… because Denise couldn’t be near the fumes during her pregnancy. So I hope he offers soon… I don’t feel I should have to TELL him, ya know? I don’t WANT to TELL him… and I shouldn’t have to ask him… doesn’t everyone know this basic stuff? 🙄

I have all the fabrics to make curtains, adult blankets, pillows, swaddling blankets, and to recover the mini ottoman/toybox/bench. I bought all the drywall patching and primer paint. I repainted the bedside table and the storage drawers for under the crib. All we need left is the crib, window shades, paint and curtain rods. Too bad I’m totally BROKE! 😆

Yeah, I worked all that overtime and I’m broke. 😦 WTF? It goes way faster than you can imagine… Of course, going to Caseys everyday for a “snack” probably doesn’t help… fronting James for all his stuff probably doesn’t help either… buying the boys groceries because they suck at saving any money didn’t help… Spending $500 on one washing machine did NOT help at all… *sigh* 🙄

But it will be okay. It will.

Be okay.

I’m pretty sure.

Oh, I almost forgot to tell ya’ll…

My former sister-in-law (the good one, not the skanky evil bitch one) stopped by my house this week and dropped off some clothes for my precious little baby boy (not you Nate… dumbass… :roll:). Her son (my former nephew) had a baby boy a few months ago and she had bought him some items that he could not wear anymore and never did wear. I thought she would just be dropping a couple of items off… maybe a few onesies and an outfit or two…

She just dropped it off and we chatted for a minute… I was myself this time, which I am thankful for… I didn’t clam up and act like a dumbass. 😆 Anyway, I didn’t look in the bag until later in the afternoon once I finished working for the day. I was in shock! It was way more than I imagined!

I sat down and cried for 20 minutes after I looked at everything. I mean, seriously? It’s a whole wardrobe for a newborn… down to a snowsuit! All I really need to complete the wardrobe is some onesies and socks! She gave me E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G!!!

The only thing I miss about my marriage, and the only reason I held on for as long as I did, was because of that family. I miss them. I miss not having ANYONE on earth to really lean on like you do a full blown family. I had that. I let it go. But I had that.

And I guess just seeing how generous she was and how genuinely happy she was for me and realizing how much I missed that kind of overwhelmed me. I know the pregnancy hormones did NOT help any, but still… I was just so emotionally overwhelmed by her generosity towards me. I tried thanking her publicly on Facebook, but I doubt she will ever really know, or that I would ever really even be able to express in words, just how great she made me feel.

I hope karma is good to her… she deserves it for this one…

okay, okay… I’m crying again! Geez Louise! Did I mention to you guys that I cried when I watched the trailer for Warrior this week? 🙄

On that note…



Say what you mean, Mean what you say...

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