Well, I’m feeling a little bit more like myself lately… no thanks to modern medical doctors… 😑

I hope everyone had a beautiful Thanksgiving filled with love and laughter. Mine wasn’t too bad. πŸ™‚

I did have to cook everything which was exhausting but the food seemed good and the turkey was actually cooked right this year. James came despite him trying to get out of it several times that day. Andrew’s parents were talkative and fun conversation to have at the table. It was a nice little slice of family life and I really enjoyed it.

As I said before, James came after me guilting him into coming. He did have ulterior motives for coming since he dropped a bombshell on me afterwards. I won’t disclose the bombshell here just yet since I don’t think he has told very many people, but it was a life changer… and I hope he views it that way and gets his life on track now…

He did tell me that he “had” to tell Tim I was pregnant. 😯 As I have said time and time again, I do NOT think that Tim was a clueless person here. I think he totally already knew i was pregnant. But that doesn’t really matter I guess… what matters is that he used the information to manipulate James’ feelings once again.

πŸ™„

When James told him I was pregnant, Tim told James that that ruined his chances of ever reconciling with me…

😯

What?????

Puh-leese… he was never planning on reconciling with me. There was an actual window of opportunity where I all but invited him to try and he completely didn’t try so what the fuck ever! It pisses me off that he used that information to make James think I myself have ruined that as an option.

Tim is living with someone! He has been living with her since like November or December 2009. 2 YEARS! What… did he think I was going to become one of his infamous mistresses one day or something? Why even say this to your completely bipolar, depressed child? WTF? Ugh! 😑

It just makes me so mad that he used this as a manipulation tool on James. James sees it from Tim’s side. He doesn’t see that it is morally wrong for Tim (and this is how Tim is serving it up to James…) to be pining away and secretly wishing to be with me when he is with another woman. Has the man learned absolutely nothing from his past? That’s what it looks like to me… it’s either that or he is totally lying to try once again to make it seem like the reason James’ parents are not together is solely because his mother is stupid…

ARGHHH!!!! 😑

Luckily, I have been feeling much better about life these last few days so the anger has really subsided into ridiculous awe… πŸ˜†

I went to the doctor on Friday. I weighed in with my boots on (2 pounds remember?) and the stupid scale said I had gained weight. Andy did the calculation (of course… kick me when I’m down, tyvm πŸ™„ ) and I have gained 17 pounds since the start. I am just now entering month 8 of my pregnancy…

Technically, I have only gained 15 pounds (because of my boots, dammit!) but still… This was the first time my doctor (this one) has said anything about my weight… reminding me that I can only gain 15-20 pounds… and I’m at 17… πŸ™„ FML

The thing is… I weighed myself earlier last week and I had lost a pound! WTF? How did I gain like 5 pounds in a couple of days? The doctor swears that a large Thanksgiving meal would not do that and I agree. He says I’m not retaining water but I know that I am…

I also gave him my list of complaints regarding my general overall feeling and my joint pain. He poo poo’d it all off as “normal” aches and pains but did confirm that my complaints seemed more severe… but still normal. So he basically gave me no advice but to grin and bear it and maybe buy a prenatal pelvic belt.

I get better advice on the internet. I swear. If I ever got paid that kind of money, I would feel bad giving people no advice at all. It’s like stealing money! WHAT DO YOU DOOOOO????

So I have read over several medical studies funded in the UK on Symphisis Pubis Dysfunction… apparently, they take this condition I have alot more seriously overseas than here in the states, which is ridiculous because when you look at the number of women complaining online about it… you would think ONE of these American doctors would take note! πŸ™„ Anyway…

So, since it is a very common thing, there are all sorts of various information online. The UK girls actually get medical care and physical therapy when this happens so they have the 411 on info for alleviating symptoms. I have read alot of their stories and some of the studies and have been trying to implement the strategies. I am still in alot of pain but it’s not crippling pain like it was before. When I get my pelvic belt in the mail, I hope to be fully functioning even if I am still somewhat sore.

My whole mental well being… that’s another beast… the doctor said my cbc did not show an iron deficiency or red blood cell count decrease. The cbc was done 3 weeks ago. I was at my worst about 1-2 weeks ago. You know… being a crazy lunatic…

I have almost ALL the symptoms of iron deficiency which is also associated with decreases in red blood cell count. I take prenatal vitamins with iron which is supposed to meet the minimum iron requirements… however, what no one told me is that calcium taken at the same time will cause the iron to not be absorbed. 😯 And I take calcium with the prenatal vitamins every single day…

Andy also pointed out that I ran out of Folic Acid about 3 weeks ago. I hadn’t been to Walgreens so I hadn’t refilled my bottle. I went to Walgreens on Black Friday to get some. i was reading the bottle and it says right on there that it promotes red blood cell growth. DUH.

So I have been taking the folic acid again and I am waiting to take the calcium at night now… and viola! What do you know? I am suddenly feeling a hell of alot more upbeat! πŸ˜€ I don’t care what my freaking doctor says… you know, the guy who gets paid $100k+ a year to look after gals like me… I know that if he had just taken the time to take me seriously he could have helped me. He didn’t. I helped me. Modern medicine sucks when it isn’t used well. That’s all I’m saying…

The baby’s nursery is almost done… Now that I am saner and calmer, I feel bad for being such a basket case for Andrew. 😦 He is a great man for putting up with me… I was quite a pitiful girl.

He has been painting his ass off for a few days. Even when I ask him not to, he still does it because he knows I am anxious. He was telling me the other day that we really didn’t need to be in such a rush because the baby won’t even sleep in there for the first couple of months. He is right. But I told him I was anxious and we have an office full of baby stuff and unfinished projects everywhere and I’m really anxious… and he gave up his quest to talk me into slowing down and sped up for me! πŸ™‚

Maybe he just wants me to get off his ass… Maybe he is sick of hearing me complain and cry and be a pathetic whiner… or maybe he just loves me enough to want to do that for me… I’m going with the last one. πŸ˜‰

He has been so nice and caring and loving and attentive and I have been one hot mess after another. We had a really wonderful Thanksgiving together and he even wants to include more family next year, which is not like him at all… We have had some great conversations about parenting, not necessarily agreeing all the time but I think he is open to things he wouldn’t have thought he would be…

You know, after my miscarriage in the beginning of 2010, I had kind of decided that I would love to be a parent again, with or without a man. I really just thought I was so strong as a woman that I could do it without a man. I am woman hear me roar type of ego…

Now, I don’t know what I would have done without having Andrew to lean on and to support me. I am so very, very lucky to have him. I am so blessed that all of those other women passed him up and didn’t give him the chance he deserved. Their loss was my gain. πŸ™‚

Okay, enough sappiness… geez! Preggo hormones gone wild! πŸ˜†

I have an exhausting schedule coming up. My doctor now wants to see me every single week, which is a such a pain in the ass considering how little he helps me… I have to rearrange my work schedule every week to try to accommodate that. I have a breast feeding class, child birth classes, a baby shower, my office Christmas party, and a HUGE to do list that seems to never end… πŸ™„

We are getting down to the wire though. Sean Christopher could show up at any time. He certainly acts like he wants to break free from the womb! Quite the mover and shaker this one is… Andy just messaged me and told me he did the first coat of paint on the baby’s room (and I told him not to do it until later this week…) so we should be ready to start moving stuff in there soon! EXCITED!!!! I will definitely post pictures when we are done! I can’t wait!

πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

PEACE!!!

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