Scary Stuff…

Posted: March 4, 2012 in Unwanted Advice

So I have a childhood friend I was chatting with the other night and just generally catching up and she reminds me that she had a baby that died of SIDS like 20+ years ago. 😦

I forgot all about that. So sad.

At first, just felt bad that I had gone on and on about baby Sean and how happy I was with him. Then I felt sad because it was clear she still carries that pain with her after 20 years. Now, I just feel panic and extreme anxiety. 😯

So ya’ll know me… I research everything… so I started looking up SIDS related information online. BIG MISTAKE!

That whole “knowledge is power” thing does not apply when it comes to SIDS. You can have all the knowledge in the world and it just won’t matter. I have read story upon story of poor little babies dying for absolutely no reason at all. Almost 2/3 of SIDS babies didn’t even have any risk factors…

I have several risk factors. 😦

So now I am freaking the hell out!

Seriously! 😯

As we approach the 2 month mark, I find out that 80% of SIDS cases happen between months 2 to 4. 90% happen before the 6 month mark. There are still a few that happen beyond that…

And I have risk factors… I smoked during my pregnancy… Yeah, I quit but I still smoked for a portion of it. Plus, every single person I know smokes and I was exposed to smoke every single day of my pregnancy. 😯

I probably have sleep apnea which is hereditary and a possible risk factor. There is no fan currently in his room so I need to get that. When we remodeled that room, there was mold on some of the walls. I cleaned it up but what if it comes back? That’s a risk factor… :/

I drink caffeine. Sean is easily overheated. Alot of times, Sean won’t sleep unless he is swaddled… but the blanket we swaddle him with eventually comes loose and could end up around his head. 😯

I am freaking the fuck out here…

The bottom line is, though, that I can fix some of this stuff but it may not make any difference at all. That makes me feel so powerless… and scared… I’m very scared.

When I was young, I never thought about this stuff! Now, I’m 41 and a basket case!

*sigh*

This is not good. πŸ˜₯

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