So me and my BFF Joanne got in a huge fight. πŸ™„

I don’t know if it’s the end of our friendship or not. I am not prepared to say that just yet, but I am definitely not feeling particularly bad about what went down. It’s sad but that doesn’t mean I think I’m wrong.

I won’t go into the details because I just typed it out and I now realize how insane it makes everything look. So let’s just say that she pissed me off by once again not listening or valuing anything I said to her, I told her why I was mad about it, and then she proceeded to FAH-REEK out because I “am not going to talk to her that way!”

Like I’m fucking 5 years old…

Look… First of all, I’m a grown ass adult… don’t talk to me like I’m one of your children by ORDERING me to not talk a certain way. I’m not. Talk to me like an adult. You can say all day long you don’t appreciate how I was talking to you but don’t you dare ORDER me around.

Second, did you ever think that you are OVERREACTING??? LIKE ALWAYS??? You may not like what I had to say and that’s fine by me. I respect your opinion. But, do NOT tell me I can’t talk that way and don’t take it way too seriously. I wasn’t being condescending like you were to me. I didn’t disrespect you by talking to you like a child and telling you how you should talk to people so don’t disrespect me that way. I feel every adult has the right to express themselves however they want. I don’t have to listen to them is all.

Third, the great thing about having real friends is that sometimes you can act like an ass or there may be certain traits you have that are generally undesirable to most human beings… BUT… you can get away with acting that way with your real friends because they love you.

I felt that way about Jo. She had traits that most people wouldn’t and do not tolerate and I put up with them because she has other beautiful traits that I love about her. The one time I get truly angry with her and she flips the fuck out. Geezus. Come on! πŸ™„

I just don’t have time for insanity right now. Go be completely insane with someone else. If you were really my friend, you would see that this is a really bad time to ask me to put up with your bipolar shit. Work stress is killer right now. My schedule makes it so I have NO free time to myself. My house is a freaking disaster and I need to have it cleaned up by the end of the month. I am planning a wedding that is supposed to be in like 6 or 7 weeks. I have not received my wedding dress from my seamstress and she thinks my ceremony is on August 4th so WTF…

Seriously. 😐

A real friend would not be giving me so much grief right now. 😦

I really don’t get why I can’t get any real local friends. All these women seem to have something wrong with them! πŸ˜†

I’m not trying to discriminate, but I never had this issue in the city! Never! And I know you city girls are all still out there and I love you all to pieces! But I can’t just drive into the ‘burbs for a quick run around to the clearance bins at Target or sushi at that weird Asian place on 7th Street. I have a baby in tow and he is NOT a happy traveler! I wish he was because that’s what I need…

I need friends who:

1. Are not diagnosed with any mental illnesses.
2. Are not afraid to leave town or their houses or their spouses for a couple of hours.
3. Want to go shopping with me, even if it’s just to the grocery store!
4. Have not self diagnosed themselves with more than 2 illnesses in the last 30 days.
5. Actually answer phones calls AND texts MOST of the time.
6. Actually like me and want to be around me.
7. Are not condescending or patronizing.
8. Are LOYAL and have my back.
9. Eat sushi. All.the.time.
10. Will break out in dance every time they hear a Bee Gees song over the muzak loud speakers in department stores/malls.

I actually do have one local friend like this BUT she’s typically a loner and never thinks to invite me anywhere because I live 8 miles away now instead of just a few blocks. So, in light of that, I guess I will add:

11. cannot be a loner, and
12. is thoughtful enough to invite me, because I’ll say yes every time! πŸ˜‰


I don’t mind being alone and without friendly companionship. I don’t. It’s just that I really miss girl friends like I had in the city. I miss random decisions to go order 5 appetizers at Dennys and sit there for 3 hours eating and talking and drinking coffee. I miss going shopping at Pier One for napkin rings and coming out with whiskey barrels just because Nate talked me into them. I miss grocery shopping at 2am in walmart with Debbie because we both can’t sleep. I miss catching a random bad movie with Shereen because we both just need to get the hell out of our houses for 2 freaking hours. πŸ˜‰

I know many of you from EP who I met many years ago and have done many things with will say you all are still here for me. I appreciate that. I wish I lived closer so we could share our good times and adventures again. I have such great memories. Seeing everyone a couple of times a year is great. I just wish you would all pack up your shit, quit your highfaluting city jobs, and come live in the sticks by me!

Please? Pretty pretty please?



Say what you mean, Mean what you say...

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