Posts Tagged ‘weight loss’

I know I have been MIA. I have been so frustrated with this stall I am in and just really didn’t know what to say. I was hoping I could break it and be all like, “Look at how fucking smart I am!”


But I’m not smart, apparently. Because I am still stalled.


I am not perfect by far. But I am determined. Every time I do low carb, I get stalled at around 40 pounds. I get frustrated and pissed off and abandon the plan for low calorie/high carb. I’m not doing that this time. Mostly because I’m stubborn and now I feel like I have a vendetta against my rebellious body.


So, I have just been trudging on. And not losing.

Here’s the things I think are holding me back:

1. Not enough sleep
3. Fucking POPCORN!
4. Too much snacking
5. Using net carbs

One of the battles I seem to be having lately is insomnia. Is this a side effect of menopause? Someone tell me now! It’s killing me. Last week, I spent one night laying wide awake in bed until 4:45am and then my kid woke up at 8am. This is not conducive to weight loss. GRRRR!


Lately, I have been craving sweets. This is not me. I am not a sweet eater. I got fat eating onion rings, french fries, fried chicken, pasta, risotto, enchiladas, and tacos. But my one sweet spot in my heart is reserved for chocolate peanut butter ice cream. So I can’t have that low carb ice cream around because I could eat a quart in a week easily and it has ALOT of sugar alcohols. So I came up with a brilliant idea to use one tablespoon of sugar free chocolate chips mixed in with all natural peanut butter.

Now, overall, this is low carb… but not when you eat 4 tablespoons of peanut butter with it. Because 4 tablespoons is like 11 grams of carbs! That’s half of my carb allowance in general for the day! WTF? And I keep doing it! Someone stop me!



The ONE thing that I miss on low carb more than anything in the whole wide world is bad, bad GMO popcorn with lots of real butter. And I can’t eat just a cup or two. I need to eat the whole damn bowl!

My husband and I watch and go to movies all the time. It’s like our thing. And movie theaters do not sell ANYTHING low carb. Jerky and pork rinds are NOT theater food. So shut your face if that’s your solution…


In general, I do fine all day until I get off work. After I get my kid to bed, I am starving… I eat something… and then another something… and then some peanut butter… and then another something… GAH!

When I did low calorie/high carb, this was something I could work around. However, most of the items on low carb are high calorie or high protein. So I am constantly fucking my whole macro plan up! It’s so frustrating because I *know* what I am doing AS I am doing it!

I usually talk myself into snacking by making sure it’s low carb. But if it’s low carb, it’s usually high protein! Which just turns into glucose anyway! FML!


For example, just now, I went and grabbed a chicken leg from the frig… I’m already at 80g of protein for the day! I didn’t need to eat the fucking chicken leg!

So this is how I am currently spiraling out of control. I do have a plan to stop it.

To Be Continued…



Well, it has now been 4 months since I started LCHF (Low Carb, High Fat) and I am feeling FABULOUS! I have now lost:


And that was with a full blown cheat day for my birthday where I gained 6 pounds overnight! I call that a WIN to have lost almost 8 pounds in a month. I mean, one whole week was just used working off my cheat day so the 8 pounds lost was really in 3 weeks.

I haven’t taken measurements yet, because I’m effing laaazzzyyy. (You all know this about me…) I hope to remember to do them first thing tomorrow morning.

From my prior post, I detailed out my planned cheat day and my recovery plan. It went very well and I lost all that I gained plus a few ounces. That’s fine with me. I really do feel like it was worth it. I had no ill side effects that so many others complain about other than just general fatigue… kind of like an extended carb crash. But it wasn’t awful or anything I would have complained about incessantly in the groups.

My recovery plan worked amazingly well. I had a full on chicken week. I precooked 3.75 pounds of chicken breasts. From that, I made several servings of several meals.


Most mornings I ate a spinach omelet because that is my go-to meal. The thing about these omelets is that you can add more fat or protein as needed. Plus they are creamy and yummy and hot, very much like my prior comfort foods that I loved…

This actually made for a very cheap eats week on LCHF. The chicken was on sale for $1.99 a pound last week. What pisses me off about chicken breast these days is that they add broth to them, because apparently, all the domestic chickens are flavorless. Plus, they are just trying to screw you over. You know it, I know it. So the 3.75 pounds of chicken breast only weighed like 2.5 pounds after it was cooked. So, whatever…

Anyway, for $7.44 for the chicken and a dozen large eggs at $1.49, I had all my protein for the week. I used 2 tablespoons of chopped fresh cilantro, a stalk of celery, a couple of tablespoons of mayo, and 2 small green onion stalks to make all of the above. I added one bag of steamable broccoli florets, a bag of spinach, a large head of romaine, one avocado, a bag of shredded cheddar, and sour cream. Even if you add in all the condiments I already had on hand, like soy sauce, sesame seeds, butter, salsa, sesame oil, and various snacks (usually 1-2 oz. nuts or sugar free candy/aldi’s bars), I spent maybe $30 for the week. That’s not bad…

So, for my recovery week, I tried my best to stay at 1400 calories or less. That was sometimes hard because I also was trying to keep my fat macro about 70%. That is super hard. But I accomplished this most days and I easily lost the 6 pounds I had gained from my super gluttonous cheat day (well, it was more like a 1.25 day).

Oh, and apparently, the menus are popular so here was the menu from my frig this last week:

Cheap LCHF Chicken Week Menu

You will notice that snacks aren’t listed here. I have gotten into this habit… well, it’s an old bad habit that is now adapted for this new way of living… but I basically buy cheap snacks when I see them. I actually am not a sweets eater. I got fat eating lowfat carbs like whole wheat bread, pasta, and rice and deep fried carbs like french fries, onion rings (yum!), and beer battered fish or hard shell tacos. I have no idea why I buy all these low carb sweets.

Basically, I horde snack foods “just in case”. Like, I am horrified at the thought that if I am desperate to eat — and there are days where I am working so hard that this does happen– I want the ability to snack on something and not feel incredibly bad about it. I have bags of various nuts, sugar free toffee squares and chocolate truffles, the new Aldi’s low carb bars, Quest bars, one serving packets of Justin’s almond or peanut butter, pork rinds, etc. in a shelf area in my office desk.

The thing is… I keep buying this shit and I rarely eat any of it. Or, when I do eat something, it is less than one serving of it. So the shelf is actually becoming a little full. I guess I need to stop that… Maybe. Kinda. I’ll try. 😛



When I started my new way of living/eating, I decided that I would have three designated cheat days a year: My birthday, my anniversary, and Christmas Day. I know people get crazy righteous about cheat days in online communities so I keep this shit to myself…

cheat meals 1

So, this weekend was one of those cheat days. If you want to see what I ate, feel free to go to my Myfitnesspal page and take a looksie. Yes. I documented it. The whole ugly day… fair warning — it’s a horrific carb filled nightmare. 😛


No regrets here. I don’t feel one bit bad. 🙂

Look… we are all human. Cake is good. Carbs taste fucking amazing. Let’s be real here. Life would be very sad without polenta or spaghetti or Popeye’s Spicy Fried Chicken or (insert your favorite carb here). I think it is entirely unrealistic to tell yourself you will NEVER have a certain something or another of pure bliss unless you will die from it.

I have a “foster” son who is highly lactose intolerant. He also has MS. 😦  He doesn’t need any help feeling like crap and he generally tries to eat healthy for his own well being. But he loves ice cream. He doesn’t eat it often but he does occasionally do it. For him, the risk is worth the pleasure.

That’s how I view cheat days. The risk is worth the pleasure. Sooo… How much weight gain did this pleasure cost me? 6 pounds.


I know. It seems like alot. But if you check out my food log, you will see that I ate about 3500 calories for the whole cheat day. To gain 6 pounds of actual fat, I would have had to eat at least 21,000 calories. So it’s most likely water weight. (I hope…)


Anyway, people on Facebook and in the online groups would be freaking the hell out if this happened to them. I’m just kinda like “meh”… no biggie. I planned to do it. I knew what I wanted. I had a plan for the following week. I’m not curled up into the fetal position on my floor in deep throes of regret contemplating suicide. I’m good!

I think that the people who lose their willpower and unexpectedly fall off the wagon are the ones who freak out. Planning is key. I have known about this from the beginning. I did contemplate not doing it because I was actually within 5 pounds of my first goal (pre-happiness weight) but decided to just do it. I felt like if I didn’t stick with my plan now then I would talk myself into going off for a day later when it wasn’t as well planned out. THEN, freak out.

crackhead skinny

So I stuck to the plan. I don’t regret it. I’m doing pretty good. I don’t really get all the extreme symptoms that people speak of when they cheat like feeling horrible from all the carbs in their system or feeling like they have the flu. What’s that about?

I suppose everyone is different… but I had no ill side effects of eating carbs. I felt fine. I feel fine. My only side effect it seems is that I am extremely tired today. Like first trimester type fatigue where I probably could have slept all day if I didn’t have a terrible two toddler running my life right now. Other than that, no issues…

cheat meal bliss

Like I said, I have a plan for this week. The plan is to eat closer to 1300-1400 calories a day (about 200-300 less than my daily average) and be pretty strict on my water intake. Today, I ate about 10 grams of carbs and I would like to keep the carbs to between 10-15 all week. Oh, also, I’m doing an all chicken week! (I’ll do a separate post on that another time.)

It’s my first cheat day this year so I am not for sure that this “plan” will redeem me from the chinese meal-a-palooza, 10 cups of buttered popcorn, 2 mixed drinks, 3 beers, and the late night gas station pizza slice I downed in a parking lot full of bar patrons. But I’m okay with it all for now.

I might be freaking out in a week or two if I never recover from this, but I am banking on the odds being with me. Fingers and toes crossed!

weight loss gain






Not too shabby for this fat chick, eh? I am pretty satisfied. I mean, I wish it was like 100 pounds but whatev…  🙂

I actually think it would have been slightly more, but remember how I decided to stop drinking caffeine? Yeah, that didn’t work out so well. I actually GAINED 2 pounds that first week. After some research and constant bitching over at EP, I found out that caffeine is generally a diuretic… And when you stop drinking caffeine, your body… MY stupid freaking body… retains water.


So I stopped that. 😆 I mean, the benefits of continuing to drink coffee way outweigh the risks. For me anyway. Maybe I’ll try again when I am at goal weight but not right now. Besides, decaf coffee SUUUUUUCKS!!!

So, anyway, I am super excited that I have lost so much weight. I have no illusions that I will continue to lose more than 10 pounds a month. My goal is 4 pounds a month. Anything over that is gravy. Low carb gravy…

Oh! And another thing I realized during my no caffeine week was that my efforts to increase my carbs caused me to not get enough fat in, which may have contributed to not losing any weight that week. As a result, I wasn’t even eating 1500 calories. It’s funny, because you’d think I would lose weight by eating less calories. that is NOT the case, though, when your body hates you. Nope.

So, I upped my fat, started drinking coffee again, and increased my calories to 1600-1700 a day. And the 2 pounds I gained turned into 3 pounds lost! I’m okay with that. 😉

I know (because I have been told 100 times by the militant bitches in the Facebook groups over and over and over again) that I am not supposed to be counting calories on LCHF, but um… FUCK OFF! I know my super catty, overly frumpy, control freak body better than anyone else. It needs calorie restriction. I cannot lose weight by eating 3000 calories a day. Bitches.


In fact, I have had it with all these internet people who like to tell you how you should live. I imagine they are all homebound and lonely and have nothing better to do than to try to instigate bullshit all day. Back in the day, I was always up for a good fight. Now, at 40ish, I have no patience at all. I do not have time to explain to you why you are ignorant or why your peers that you are defending are ignorant. Seriously. I have way better things to do in my life… carry on telling everyone else how to live… and stay the hell away from me.

I had two instances where people tried to provoke me into arguments on Facebook this week. I didn’t bite. I thought about it. And then I decided I needed to paint my toenails. Priorities, people! Priorities! 😀

I haven’t weighed myself in a couple of days but I hope it’s positive… or rather, NEGATIVE. 😆 I ate a shit ton of creamed spinach this week. I don’t even like spinach a whole lot but the taste is addictive!


Okay, it’s not the best picture in the world… it is what it is… here’s the recipe for the spinach:


Items in this meal Calories Protein Fat Carbs Fiber Sugar
New Star – Classic Spinach – Raw, 140.3 g (1 1/2 cups) 33 3 0 5 3 0
Onions – Raw, 20 g 8 0 0 2 0 1
Centrella – Grated Parmesan Cheese, 0.8 Tb (5g) 15 2 1 0 0 0
Spices – Garlic powder, 0.5 tsp 5 0 0 1 0 0
Philadelphia Cream Cheese – Original, 2 oz 200 4 18 2 0 0
Butter – Unsalted, 3 tbsp 305 0 35 0 0 0

(Well, that table just looks horrific… HELP!)

Keep in mind that I used 3 Tablespoons of butter because I needed to up my fat. You could use one tablespoon. Or use a different fat like Olive Oil or Coconut Oil. Whatever. It’s totally adjustable. And it’s filling. And super rich and decadent. Mmmm! 😀

And before some jack off comes around here bitching at the measurements… I use a digital scale and weigh everything I can. I am super anal and a chronic perfectionist. Measurements are not always the same for every person doing the measuring in a cup. For example, it says the 140 grams of spinach was only 1 1/2 cups. I’m telling you…. no. It was way more than 1 1/2 cups. Grams don’t lie. That’s the way I roll. There are a million recipes out there for Creamed Spinach. Go find one of the other ones if you hate my measurements.  😛

The totals for the recipe above, as is: 566 Calories, 9 grams of protein, 54 grams of fat, 10 total carbs, 3 fiber, (7 Net carbs), 1 sugar. You can make several changes to alter for various reasons. Taking the onion out saves 2 carbs and 1 sugar, for example.

Okay, so there is my two month weigh in post. If anyone here is using Myfitnesspal, feel free to friend me. My user name is reneeroling. I need friends there… because just like in real life, I am a loner there too. 😐


Okay, so I am a slacker… I totally started a post at the one month mark and never finished it… My bad.

So, 1 month and 11 days into Low Carb High Fat, I am down 18 pounds! Not bad, not bad… I have done worse in my lifetime, by far… 🙂

Part of the reason I have been slacking on the blog end is because I have been learning so much about my own personal nutritional needs and tweaking as I go along. It seems like every year that I get older, I am having a harder time losing weight consistently, so tweaking is more necessary.


What I have discovered is that I need no help to be Low Carb High Fat (LCHF). I am naturally inclined to be that way, as is. I meet all my goals easily for 5% carbs, 20% protein, and 75% fat without resorting to all the special tricks other people are saying they have to do. My problem was that I was meeting those goals by like 3pm everyday! So then I would be starving!

The “veterans” on the LCHF groups and forums were of no help in my predicament. They would basically say I was eating too much. But I was starving. Like, literally, stomach growling starving. Apparently, I am just a gluttonous pig. 😐 Bitches.

So, anyway, they were of no help at all. I had to figure this out all by myself. I want to post my tweaks here, in case anyone else has the same troubles I did. Maybe they will give you some ideas on how to adapt the low carb thing to your advantage…

First of all, let me tell you, my protein limit is around 75g a day. I say “around” because I want it to be lower but I still sometimes get higher. Now, 3 ounces of chicken breast is 27g of protein. Do you KNOW how little a 3 oz. piece of chicken breast is???? It’s ridiculously small! One Butterball Turkey Burger is 31g! And that is just the meat! If you eat dairy (like 1 oz of cheese on the damn burger) and even some vegetables, those also have some protein. WTF? It adds up VERY quick.

If you are trying to maintain 10-20g of carbs total, and trying to watch calories because you are older or have health issues and can’t lose weight if you go too high on the calorie scale, and you are going way over on the protein, and you are STARVING, then maybe my trick will help. What I did was decide to increase my carbs (scary, right?), but my goal is now  20-25 NET carbs. Net carbs are the total carb grams minus the fiber grams. I also try to keep the gross carbs below 35 but I’m not super obsessed about the gross. I still try to aim for 1500 calories a day.

This trick has really opened my menu up. I am now able to add in so many more vegetables, which bulks up the amount of food I can eat. Plus, all the veggies really help with constipation, which can be a killer on the low carb diet. I also have been researching lower protein sources — meat that isn’t as hefty in protein grams per serving size.


While, my rule for myself is 20-25 net grams of carbs a day, I will have days when it’s like 15 grams net for the day. And that’s great and makes up for the higher carb days. I hope it keeps my body guessing and not sure what to do with itself but keep WHOOSHING my fat out. 😀

I want to also make a point to say that you MAY not need to tweak your fat level. I didn’t. I tried it and was eating like 200 grams of fat a day! That’s 1800 calories of fat alone! Since I am trying to keep my calories around 1500 a day, that was not something I could keep doing. I just wasn’t able to lose any weight that way. Besides, I get more than enough fat by cooking everything in butter, olive oil, or coconut oil.

When you look on the internet and in the forums and groups, people are always talking about Fat Bombs (low carb, low protein, high fat sweets usually) and BPC/Bullet proof Coffee (coffee with butter, coconut oil, and/or heavy cream). I make Fat Bombs, but not for the fat. I basically use them to avoid going to the gas station and buying a whole case of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

And, I completely cut out the “BPC”. Coffee with butter actually tastes pretty effing awesome, but I just didn’t need the fat and calories. Lots of people do the BPC in place of breakfast and sometimes even lunch. I am unable to do that. My body SCREAMS for food if I even attempt to skip a meal. When I was younger, I skipped meals all the time when I was dieting. No can do now. 😦

I do still drink coffee. I am trying to switch to decaf right now in an attempt to lower my cortisol levels, but I do still drink it. My current morning coffee is 16 oz. of coffee, 1/2 tablespoon of Torani’s Sugar Free Vanilla Syrup, 6-7 drops of Stevia clear liquid, 1-2 Tablespoons of heavy cream, and a dash of cinnamon. HEAVEN!


My new trick this week has been to start a water regimen. I absolutely hate water. I don’t know why. It’s just bland and blah. People are always harping on you in every freaking forum and group about drinking a gallon of water a day. Are you shitting me? 😯 There is no way I could do a gallon.

Currently, I am choking down 4-6 glasses of water a day. I hope to be able to work up to 8 but I am not real hopeful. I drink a glass of caffeine free diet pepsi or diet sunkist with heavy cream once a day as well. I think the water thing is important, though, so I hope it keeps the weight coming off for me.

Some have sent me messages or left comments on my last post about a daily menu. I have to have a super varied menu or I will not be successful losing weight so my daily meals vary by alot. I just completed a large week of stocking up at various grocery stores (one of the crappy parts of living in a dinky ass town). When I do that, I post a list of treats and meals on the frig so I don’t freak the hell out every night after work since my brain is fried by then. (I did this before dieting… it’s my way of being super anal and controlling… of myself.) 😛


Yes, that is my actual menu. Yes, it is going on my frig. Yes, I realize my handwriting is not the best here… quitcherbitchen! I figure this is about two weeks of meals. We don’t eat out often at all. Maybe once a month. Having necessary food stuffs at home is a key component for me to stay on track.

Anyway, I hope this menu gives you some ideas. I also hope I answered a few questions for people that asked. I am fully 100% committed to doing this for a lifetime and I don’t mind figuring things out along the way. 😉

Next up is supplements. I currently take Magnesium at night. I have also been using sea salt regularly. I bought green coffee bean extract and raspberry ketones because they were on sale at Walgreens last week. I have not started my research on this at all yet. What should I take for optimal weight loss? And the first person that emails me some shit about advocare or xenadrine is going to have a voodoo curse put on them. (I don’t practice voodoo but I know a guy…) 😐

I want all natural, proven with studies, worth me paying for supplements… I need help with weight loss, stress (big time), sleep, and painting my house. Please and thank you!


So I started low carbing again on February 2nd. It’s been two weeks. I told myself that I would give myself about one month to pull myself together to make any adjustments and whatnot.


Using the basic principles of low carb, high fat, I have lost…

(Drum Roll, Please…)

13.8 pounds!

Not too shabby. I’m not overly excited. I lost 12 pounds the first week, which was probably a shit ton of water weight. I didn’t lose anything this week until I upped my fat intake and lowered my protein intake and now I am finally down the 1.8 pounds this week. I am hoping this week goes better than that.


I’m not trying to lose weight super quick but who the hell doesn’t like to see two pounds a week gone? I mean, honestly… I wish I could do that all the time. But I know it just is not realistic for me so I am not planning on counting on it.

In past years, I would always aim for a 30 pound weight loss per year. I did that for 2 years in a row. Then I got all happy and snuggly and pregnant and married. I know, right? WTF was I thinking?

Well, it has just crept right the hell back up there… 😡 So, now I am back at it… and am overly anxious to just get to the point I was when I started dating my husband again. Which was still morbidly obese but better than where I am at now!

I will say that I was taken aback by the weight loss I have had. I don’t know how much your body stores of water or where it stores it at but I wear a Bodymedia armband and it fell off one morning when I got out of bed. When I put it back on, it fell right off again. I finally figured out that I had to tighten it because it was too big at the adjustment I had it at. That was a good feeling… 😀

Right now, my goal is just to get back to the dating weight. Then my goal will be to hit the mark that my driver’s license says. Then, my goal will be to get one pound under the weight I was as a high school senior. I was heavier than your average teenager but I was fucking HAWT back in the day… from there, I will have to make some decisions…

Look at those legs! Sex-ay!

I haven’t really said much to anyone in real life about doing this. My grandmother-in-law knows and tells me to eat fruits and vegetables please… And my husband knows but acts like he doesn’t and keeps eating all of my “diet” food…He’s going to be disappointed this week because I bought a bunch of salad stuff. 😆

I suddenly see I have a whole group of friends and acquaintances that are all undergoing bariatric surgery. That is so discouraging to me. My insurance company sucks and my maximum out of pocket costs are high. I can’t afford to take $5000 from my budget to pay for a surgery that would force me to eat low carb! *sigh*


The big news on the home front is that my daughter’s new boyfriend, who we thought was great, dumped her. 😦 Then, we found out he was basically controlling her and being manipulative, passive aggressive, and just plain nutso. She was so heart broken. And the asshole kept posting pictures of him and the girl he had dumped her for and saying how beautiful the girl was. And then his family members liked all the posts. How low class on all of their parts.

Chelsea did nothing wrong. She did whatever he asked. She changed anything she could about herself. She felt his family really liked her. They must have… they added her to their I-Pass account so she could visit anytime. In the process of all of this, she stopped talking to all her family and friends on a regular basis. She would clam up anytime anyone tried to find out anything about what was going on with her.

She was trying to be a perfect girlfriend… and he made her feel like she was always lacking. He never once posted a picture on his facebook of the two of them together. He was always cold and fake when around her family and friends. He was always cocky. He would always criticize Chelsea on the way she talked or her thought processes… things that we as her family loved about her…


It has been a few days now and she has reconnected with friends. She is opening up more as she comes out of the fog and sees him for who he truly is. I am just hoping he stays away and gives her a chance to find someone better, someone normal, someone sane. She deserves that. He keeps trying to string her along… but I think she’s starting to realize he’s just a cowardly douchebag. Fingers crossed!

I spoke to my brother yesterday and found out he talks to my father once or twice a week. I haven’t heard from him since the last conversation I told you about… *sigh* It’s okay. I, like my daughter, am slowly coming out of the fog my mind created of the father figure I never had to really begin with. It will be okay.

I spent my Saturday trying to convert home VCR tapes that are 20 years old to DVD. They have to play while the DVD recorder records. So many happy, happy memories. I know some of them are somewhat tainted by the fact that my ex-husband was already cheating on me in some of them, but regardless, I still see happy, contented people in all the videos, including myself. 🙂 The kids were all so cute and innocent. There were videos of all my past and present family members and it made me remember how very much I loved that family. There was even one video taken before my mom ever got sick where she is joking around with me at my Grandmother’s in Oklahoma. I am so freaking grateful that we had that video camera!

Chelsea was here while I was watching the home videos. Andy stayed out of the room. I don’t think they make him uncomfortable but I’m sure seeing his wife’s former married life is not a number one priority for him. I am very blessed that he has never been crazy jealous about my past life. My prior boyfriend was and it is impossible to erase 20 years from your life so duh. (He was a freaking idiot.)

So, I am watching these with my daughter and she’s telling me about issues people have in advanced old age (CNA talk). Then she basically tells me that I need to be DNR (a “Do Not Resuscitate” order) if I am over 80… and that’s just how it is… I’m going to a home and it will be DNR if I have any health issues… because she is not going to allow me to be bed ridden with lesions and shitting myself. I don’t know whether to be grateful or pissed off.


Chelsea can kiss my ass!